Tuesday, February 5, 2013

S2E16 'Table 34' (aka 'Marriage') Quotes: Mojo man, Sharon, Panic Moonwalk, Lil' Wayne & More!

Winston: I got my mojo back, baby! I'm the mojo man!

Jess: I saw him this morning and he just panic moonwalked away from me.
Cece: What?
Jess: He does that sometimes.

Winston [to Nick]: You've named your testicles and they're both named Sharon.

Cece: You told me you had moved on.
Schmidt: Only people who haven't moved on say things like that. I'm a squirrel, you're my nut. Winter's coming I'm gonna store you in my cheek, girl.

Cece: Hi, excuse me, I think that there's been just a little bit of a mistake with the tables...
Anu: Over 30, no advanced degrees, part-time employment. Table 34.
Cece: No, see, actually I'm a professional model. I'm not famous or anything but I was in Lil' Wayne's last video. I was the girl he was throwing strawberries at in slow motion.
Anu: Definitely table 34.

Anu: I'll tell you what's not made out of newspapers. That tight little ass of yours.

Nick: It was a nice kiss.
Jess: You were like a dog and my mouth was like a bowl full of dog milk.

Schmidt: I will "cal-cut-a" bitch.

Jess: He's in such terrible shape. You could have killed him.

Nick: Is there another doctor in the house?

Schmidt: You should see her areolas. One's like a helicopter pad, the other's one's like a tick bite. It's freaky. Very disorienting.

Schmidt: Turban on? Turban off?
Cece: I'm gonna hate myself for saying this but turban on!
Schmidt: Turban on it is!


7 comments:

  1. Once the prospective bride and groom is selected by the families and their kundlis matched to make sure that they have a happy married life , the big Indian wedding starts unfurling with its numerous unique culture. Marriage will happen to everyone sooner or later. May be you are busy pubbing and clubbing today but for a happy and secure tomorrow marriage is the only way out. Indian Marriages are not only about the couple, they involve the whole family. The Mehndi night is a festive night in the girl's family where professional Mehndi artists draw intricate designs in henna on the hands of the bride and other female members. During the Sangeet, professional entertainers are brought to regale the guests.

    The individuals not only marry each other but tie an everlasting bond with each other's family. The Shagun is exchanged by the prospective families which consist of numerous gifts to the soon to be the wed couples. The wedding rituals start with the Haldi ceremony that is done to purify and ready the bride and groom for their union. Haldi and oil is poured over their body and hair by the family members after which they are forbidden to leave their house.

    When any one's marriage is settled, an auspicious day is fixed for the wedding. On the appointed day the bridegroom is taken in a grand procession to the bride's house. He is generally clad in white silk with saffron spots on it. He wears a crown of flowers on his head. He is seated on a fine mare and is joined by a large number of men carrying different sorts of articles of pomp and grandeur. He is accompanied by his relatives and friends who are attired in their best clothes. The children wear very gaudy dresses. The procession is generally led by a band. At intervals fire-works are let off.

    When the matrimony procession reaches the bride's house, shouts of welcome in different forms rend the air. The Swaagat is the ritual to welcome the groom and his entourage by the bride's family. The kith and kin of the bride come out to receive the bride-groom and his party and conduct them to a hall richly decorated and illuminated for the occasion. The bride watches the arrival from one window of the house, careful not to gaze upon his face and then comes out to welcome him. The guests and visitors take their seats in the same hall where they are served with tea and sweets. Some who are accustomed to smoke are offered hookas. Afterwards they are led to the dining hall where sweets, pudding, puries and other dainties are lavishly served to them.

    During Vidai, the bride's brother is entrusted with couple's care. The Baraat leaves for the groom’s house are announced with drum beats and is welcomed by the women of the family. The wedding reception is the party thrown by the groom's family to announce the wedding and this usually takes place a day after the wedding.

    Marriage involves all-the families! And the best of all, it Creates Generations! So think guys and hail this medium of happily remaining in a long term relationship.



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