Schmidt: Who let the dirty slut out of the slut house?
Nick [About Brook]: She used to get drunk and pass out on our porch. It was like having a hot alcoholic cat.
Schmidt: I'd always leave water out for her.
Jimmy the usher: Look it up in a typewriter old man!
Gretchen: I'm gonna tie you down and show you pictures of my river rafting trip. It's a two hour slideshow!
Jess: Nicolas, you have to introduce me!
Nick: Oh yeah, of course, Jess this is Caroline.
Caroline: Hi..
Jess: One more time.. Cara Lee?
Caroline: Caroline.
Jess: Cara Loo? Corlaine.
Nick: Caroline!
Jess: Oh.. kay... Fancy!
Jess [About Nick]: He's so soft. Like a towel.
Schmidt: Sir, what I need you to do is this: I need you to put vodka in a water bottle, ok? And then rendezvous with me in the restroom. Ok? Same page. Same page.
Schmidt: Ruiner!
Jess: Did you just call me a ruiner?
Gretchen: Tonight, I'm gonna get certified on the river Schmidt.
Nick [About Brook]: She used to get drunk and pass out on our porch. It was like having a hot alcoholic cat.
Schmidt: I'd always leave water out for her.
Jimmy the usher: Look it up in a typewriter old man!
Gretchen: I'm gonna tie you down and show you pictures of my river rafting trip. It's a two hour slideshow!
Jess: Nicolas, you have to introduce me!
Nick: Oh yeah, of course, Jess this is Caroline.
Caroline: Hi..
Jess: One more time.. Cara Lee?
Caroline: Caroline.
Jess: Cara Loo? Corlaine.
Nick: Caroline!
Jess: Oh.. kay... Fancy!
Jess [About Nick]: He's so soft. Like a towel.
Schmidt: Sir, what I need you to do is this: I need you to put vodka in a water bottle, ok? And then rendezvous with me in the restroom. Ok? Same page. Same page.
Schmidt: Ruiner!
Jess: Did you just call me a ruiner?
Gretchen: Tonight, I'm gonna get certified on the river Schmidt.
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