|Jess imitating Winston's fart walk|
Jess: He's the first person I got to use first person narrative. [singing] I'm an amazing teacher.
Schmidt: You're penis actually changed the channel when we were watching the Bears game.
Nick/Julius Pepperwood: I'm from Chicago. Thin-crust pizza? No, thank you. I'm from Chicago.
Jess: Nick! What's my one rule?
Nick: Do not steal your yarn.
Jess: Don't steal my yard, man. My one thing.
Schmidt: A pogo is what your friends talk about when you leave the room.
Cece: Oh! Like your barnacle toe nails?
Nick: Never get caught without a safe word. We're gonna go with apricot.
Jess: That's way to normal. We need to like go with something weird like dragon slippers.
Jess: I use apricot way to much in my normal life.
Nick: Why do you use apricot so much?
Jess: What am I supposed call them? Sweet tangy balls?
Jess: My eyes!! My giant eyes!!!